In life and relationships, at first we learn about what we are not able to do and also what we don’t want. We often fall in love with those, who seem to have or be something, that we too, want to have or be.
Whatever we recognise in others, that we cannot do or don’t have, but want to do, to be or to have; It is usually something, that is inherent in us in some way; But we are not yet aware of it in our selves, resist to see it or both.
Whatever ability is hiding in us, it may be very different and unique in its outcome, so we can not know or see it, until we arrive at that particular stage of self-discovery.
Eventually we will be discovered by our abilities and our purpose. Remember, as more complex a puzzle is, as longer it takes, to predict the outcome.
So do not worry, if you feel lost or without a purpose since a long time or just now. It is important to find out our purpose, but as long we don’t see it yet:
It is our purpose to find our purpose.
Eventually your “higher” purpose will find You.
As higher Your Purpose is, as more it is not about You and therefore harder to find, since you will only find it, when You start to serve others, rather than just yourself.
Often our purpose is hidden, in the midst of our fear, right within the gap of silence, when we feel the fear from within and surrender to it.
An example from my life:
To me singing is a way of connecting with the universe and taking all audience with me. The unique way of working with my voice is to many not much entertaining and does not fulfill a musical standard ratio.
I love using my voice and it gives me a deep connection and satisfaction, but when I recorded it or sing to others, i did not like it and judged my self harshly, because my mind was comparing with other musicians and my own learned ideas, how singing and music should sound. And i had a breath-taking! fear to perform and improvise in front of an audience.
Later I realized, that if I enjoy my singing, it is because of the energy I feel going through my voice and that there are other people, who can feel and enjoy that energy with me. So it is my obligation, to share the fruits, i received, with others. Once I let go of my conditioning, I realized and now live out one purpose of my life: Being a Medium, through which love and wisdom can be shared, with the energy of my voice, in all shadows and colors.
Being vulnerable in front of others, is already an ability and gift to others. Once we see clearly our gifts, we can share, it becomes easier to face our fear and do what we need to do. Now we have a mission and a purpose. We feel needed and appreciated, first by our own self and then by others too.
Another example from one of my students, who have fear of public speech.:
She did not like the topic nor the content of the presentation, which is work related.
During our session, she faced her fear, by taking a moment to feel it and taking a deep breath. Then I advised her to improvise, rather than check constantly on her paper.
After she did that, she immediately surrendered and became a witness to her own presentation. Her voice became soft, loving and combined with a playful and powerful presence (she first thought, she needs an authoritarian voice, in order to be respected..) and she really enjoyed herself. I did not understand much of the technical presentation, but really forgot myself, looking and listening to her. It was like looking at a sunset, fascinating and caressing.
Together we realized, that one of her abilities is to present technical matter in a heart-full way. She can share not only technical knowledge, but also heart-full wisdom, just by her energy. That is one fulfilling purpose, she can now serve and share with others.
By facing her fear; allowing it to be and be felt, she can be bigger, than her small self.
In this case, the fear is actually God itself, wanting to enter her and function through her, if she is willing to open up and surrender to such a powerful energy.
True self-love is based on self-knowledge. Self-knowledge is based on our ability to self reflect, open our heart and mind towards our shadows and our conditioning.
Conditioning are our learned believes about who we are, who we need to be and what we have to do or to own.
Shadows are emotions, thoughts and behavior-patterns, which we often condemn in others, but often fail to see in ourselves.
For example I can say: „He is always angry with me and I am never angry with him.“ If I fail to recognize, that I too, may be an angry person towards my self, it is most likely a shadow, which is to be recognized yet, so I can love myself deeply the way I am and not just the way I want to be.
As more I see myself the way I am, I can allow myself to be. As more I learn about what I want and what I don’t want, as more I will find, (it will come to me, because of attraction), what is really fulfilling and not only that, what is teaching me, until i can ripen enough to surrender into the hands of God, my purpose, work, community, friends and partner.
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